The tendency to redefine myself

I’m in a deep process of letting go of the part of me that is using the world to define myself.


My growth was standing in the way of my growth.


?

Let me explain.


My spiritual growth became something disturbing for my self-concept. It was disturbing ‘who I think I am’.


Every time I let go more of myself, of my blockages, I grew.


It brought me home, closer to who I really am, my essence, closer to God.


And then ego came in. Or call it my self-concept.


It was like: “Hell yeah, this is beautiful. What are we going to DO with it?”


And willingly I was letting all this self-concept-excitement take me out of this centered state.

—Never underestimate the pulling effect of these (negative AND positive) thoughts and feelings.


My self-concept was like: “Good God, this is my gift, this is what I want to bring into the world.”


And I started redefining myself. Using the world to define who I am now: after this uplevel. In this new reality.


In my personal life, in my business, everywhere. Busy redefining & busy leaving behind whatever was old.


Lately, I’m seeing this tendency very clearly. It's so subtle and so important for me to see.


It’s like you’re dancing, you completely immerse yourself in it, and then, you suddenly stop. You take a box, put yourself in it, and tie a bow around it. You lift it up and put it right down. In the world.


By doing that, you’re putting yourself outside yourself. In the ‘self-box’, limited to certain dance moves. You're selling yourself short. You are not limited by a box—you are infinite. Keep dancing, see where thoughts and emotions come up, and just don't get involved in it. Keep dancing—it's all you have to do. The rest will unfold by itself, give it space and you will receive gifts—every kind of them. Maybe the presents you get weren’t on your wishlist—but what does life have to do with your lists?!


The thing that’s important for me now, is to keep dancing—to stay centered. To stop letting myself get lost, all the way down, into redefining my self-concept over and over. Being aware where I am filling in the dots or bending all the question marks into mental concepts.


Stay centered ⚔️

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